So every morning I try to wake up before the kids, get a breakfast ready for them while I drink my coffee and just take time for myself. <----lie
 Every morning my TEN year old gets up, takes a shower on the days he has allotted for himself to take showers, makes his breakfast and packs his lunch. Then he turns on the coffee pot for me before he comes and wakes me up. <--truth

He will thank me later as he trims my bunions.
 Then there is Hunter. Hand to heaven the kid is as bad as me. About three weeks ago, Kurt and I had just gone to bed. We hear one of the kids rustling around and hunter stumbles out of his room, walks into Titus's room where he flips on the light and pulls out the goods to pee!! Thankfully Kurt pulled a triple pike flip with enough vault to get him into the room before the flood gates opened. The kid is in a vegetative state when he is asleep.
 Silas is usually the last to wake up. His helmet hair is all over the place and the first thing he wants to do is play with my hair...

I have two bald spots on my head. No joke. No one will convince me it's anything other than Gollum. No one.....
 This leaves Titus. You will refer back to earlier posts about this. No, not the diet one, jerk. And no, I didn't finish my diet. I got super good at doing my makeup...

Its working out well, thanks.
 So Titus the Toe, as I fondly thought of him, is actually tiny toe the mobster.The kid stumbles out of the bedroom this morning. Not HIS bedroom because he, about 11 pm, decided he was too good for this crib. So  he stood up, and cried the battle cry of 300....I was not entertained and I DID want him to dine "there". So I bring him into bed with me where he promptly shoved his hand down my shirt, foot into my gut and laid his body across the bed. Terrific. So this clearly means it's time to tackle all of the worlds problems. Now. Until my kids wake up.

By the time I'm supposed to be waking up for all my duties (<----lie), I'm so tired I swear I'm waking up from a bad nap. And I guess it was rough for the toe because he stumbles out of bed and comes quietly to me....and decks me in the face. With his hand. And it went like this for the rest of the day. He is a tiny little terrorist. Seriously, he holds my sanity hostage and I will pay ANYTHING to this tiny little person  just for a second of sleep...I mean PEACE.
 I know I talk about the kids a lot but seriously, what do you want me to talk about? Going to Costco, weeping at the register as they ring up my order and I hand over my right kidney? Forgetting to renew my tabs for the second month in a row and having a police officer at Starbucks tell me to get them renewed because a STATE trooper would give me a ticket for them? Fear not though, I am sure something completely ridiculous will take place for me to write about before you die of the kid story snooze fest.

It's happening again.....

What? I'm not gone for good much to the dismay of a few!!
Honestly, last year knocked the wind out of my sassy sails. My spunky, amazing, incredible mother in law was taken from us too soon. I couldn't breath for a while, it almost felt like I wasn't grieving "right". Of course there isn't a right or a wrong way, but it felt like it wasn't enough. She had done so much for us, impacted the community of Olympia in such a powerful way, it wasn't enough.
You always want your children to see things through their eyes for as long as possible, the eyes of a child. Innocent and joyful. My desire is for them to know their noni the way that the other cousins did. She baked with them, did their homework with them and was a huge part of them being who they are. It was this time last year we found out she was sick. Three days after Christmas she was gone. It's still all very raw. I wish she had come with us on our family vacation that was out of control and crazy this summer. To see how amazing it was to have all her crazy kids and their spouses and their kids under one insanely haunted roof (legit, this place was haunted). She would be so proud of the kids this year and would be horrified along with my mother at silas and his dirty dancing, Titus sticking his hands down my shirt STILL, hunter NEVER showering and Cole...well what is there bad to say about him!!
So as you can see we are coming up on a year with a hole in our hearts but I feel like I might be back...
you have missed a lot this year, no lie. My kids are cray cray....

Namaste suckas, I will have humor from here on out. Love and miss you momma M.